So happy for my best friend!!

We went shopping for her wedding dress today! She and I have been friends for 30 years... more years than some of you have lived!

Congratulations Melissa & Gary!

I love you!!

A pic from her shower, later:

Fun: Application For A Night Out With The Guys!

APPLICATION FOR A NIGHT OUT WITH THE GUYS

Name of Husband / Signifigant Other: ____________________
RE: I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest authority in my life for the following period:
Date: _____________________
Time of departure: _____________________
Time of return NOT to exceed: _____________

Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only visit the locations stated below, at the stated times. I agree to refrain from hitting on or flirting with other women. I shall not even speak to another female, except as expressly permitted in writing below. I will not turn off my mobile after two pints, nor shall I consume above the allowed volume of alcohol without first phoning for a taxi AND calling you for a verbal waiver of said alcohol allowance. I understand that even if permission is granted to go out, my girlfriend/fiancé/wife retains the right to be pissed off with me the following week for no valid reason whatsoever.

Amount of alcohol allowed (units):
Beer: _____
Wine: _____
Liquor: _____
Total: ______

Locations to be visited: _______________________________
_________________________________________________
_________________________________________________
Location: ______________________________
Start: ________
End: _____________

Location: ______________________________
Start: ________
End: _____________

Location: ______________________________
Start: ________
End: _____________

Location: ______________________________
Start: ________
End: _____________

Females with whom conversation is permitted:
Name: ______________________________________
Reason: ____________________________________

IMPORTANT CHEATING CLAUSE:

Notwithstanding the female contact permitted above, I promise to refrain from instigating or persuing any activity in any form with another individual other than the that which is granting me permission with this contract. Violation of this Cheating Clause shall be grounds for immediate termination of the relationship and fortfieture of all personal rights and possessions.
I acknowledge my position in life. I know who wears the trousers in our relationship, and I agree it’s not me. I promise to abide by your rules & regulations. I understand that this is going to cost me a fortune in chocolates & flowers. You reserve the right to obtain and use my credit cards whenever you wish to do so. I hereby promise to take you to the concert/play/event of your choice, should I not return home by the approved time. On my way home, I will not pick a fight with any stranger, nor shall I conduct in depth discussions with the said entity. Upon my return home, I promise not to urinate anywhere other than in the toilet. In addition, I will refrain from waking you up, breathing my vile breath in your face, and attempting to breed like a (drunken) rabbit.

I declare that to the best of my knowledge (of which I have none compared to my BETTER half), the above information is correct.

Signed - Husband / Signifigant Other: _________________________________



Request is (circle one): APPROVED DENIED



This decision is not negotiable. If approved, cut permission slip below and carry at all times.

Permission for my husband/signifigant other to be away for the following period of time:
Date: ____________________
Time of departure: ______________________
Time of return: _____________

Signed Wife / Signifigant Other: __________________________________________

I may never get married.....

I had a literature class. We had to journal what we were reading:

It was a typical knight’s tale including the castle, status as a favorite of the king, the beautiful wife, all followed by, of course, envy and slander. Thus begins the story of Eliduc. At first, the knight Eliduc garners your sympathy by being honorable, brave, and an exemplary model to follow: Eliduc serves faithfully, is in charge of the king’s territories, and is also given royal favors because of his performance and service. After Eliduc is slandered in his native France and dismissed by the king, Eliduc voluntarily places himself in exile and travels to England to see if he can fare any better there. Eliduc’s experiences in England almost mirror what has occurred to him up until this point in France: invited to live in the castle, status as a favorite of the king as well, the castle, and a beautiful young girl who falls in love with him. Similar, but let us not forget that Eliduc is already married in France and is committing adultery if he pursues it. Women have more control, even unknowingly, over men’s lives than they realize.

In England, Eliduc encounters his first sign of trouble – the king’s young daughter, Guilliadun. After spending some time together, the Guilliadun and Eliduc have apparently fallen head-over-heels in love together. After they make their love known to one another, Eliduc is summonsed home to France, and Eliduc makes plans to return home, but only after making a promise to Guilliadun to return to get her on a date of her choosing. Upon returning home, Eliduc is reunited with his lawful wife, Guildeluec who has remained faithful to him. But Guildeluec notices a behavior in Eliduc that is surly and secretive and plots to find out the reason why.

Upon Eliduc’s return to France, he spirits away the young Guilliadun by ship to England. Upon the boat ride home there is such a storm that all the sailors believe the worst is going to happen. One of the sailors blames the young girl, shouting that they should throw her overboard as Eliduc is defying God, and his proper wife at home by remaining with Guilliadun. This is the first time Guilliadun learns that Eliduc is married. In her shock at Eliduc’s marriage, and fearing for her life because of the sailor’s threats, Guilliadun faints, and falls to the deck without breath or sign of consciousness. Believing Guilliadun to be dead, Eliduc brings her body to a chapel in the woods to bury her. Yet after many days, Guilliadun still appears alive with rosy cheeks, pink skin, just faintly pale. Eliduc visits the chapel in secret every day, but his wife Guildeluec has him followed to discover once and for all why he is so miserable. The queen journeys to the chapel herself, and upon finding the young girl in repose, and being pretty sharp herself, she knows that the young girl Guilliadun is her husband’s mistress and the reason for his unhappiness and grief. In a magical moment of watching a weasel resurrect its dead mate with a mysterious life-giving flower, Guildeluec restores Guilliadun to consciousness and assures her of Eliduc’s love and devotion. Upon returning to the castle and reuniting the two lovers, Guildeluec observes the overwhelming love between Guilliadun and Eliduc. Realizing the depth of the love and the happiness in her husband, Guildeluec asks her husband to separate from her so she can become a nun and he can marry the girl whom he loves. This is the only way that a man can ‘legally’ marry a second woman in God and the church’s view. Guildeluec sacrifices her own lifestyle to become a nun in order for the man she married, and loves still, to be happy. Guildeluec loved Eliduc so much that she renounced their marriage for him to marry another.

What a woman.....